dear mai’a,

it’s been a weird day. actually the weirdness started last night, but anyway. since late last night i have experienced two Ramadan miracles.

the first isn’t really something i can talk so publicly about but suffice to say it’s the “bigger” miracle. something that still has me amazed and profoundly grateful. which was followed by an awesome discussion with my mentor and that led to some deeper understandings of Islamic tradition. and reminders that what is so often promoted as “how Islam addresses xyz” is very limiting and not the whole story.

the second was a situation at the end of my work day when i nearly lost my temper. i had gotten off the bus and was planning to meet my son at the corner store and then walk home together. i needed to cross a very busy street first. a truck had pulled up over into the walk lane – i mean actually over the second line, filling the lane. i never feel really safe to try to cross when drivers do that, because it pushes me too close to the traffic passing in front of them and because i don’t really trust the driver that originally pulls up that far. so i was waiting for the crosswalk light to tell me i could walk… and it just wasn’t changing! i was annoyed. tired, hot, aching. and irritated that i was going to have to wait for a whole new cycle of the lights before i could cross. right about then was when the light changed and mr.-big-truck could turn. at which time he looked out towards me and started shouting.

you know how it is… the usual “Muslim go home”, “get out of here” laced with some colorful language and a shaking fist. and then he turned his corner and was driving away from me.

of course after-the-fact i thought of what my clever response should have been… like “my ancestors were most certainly here before yours were”. and i must admit (yes, when i have to take full responsibility for it because the shaytans are chained up) i considered briefly why i hadn’t flipped him off right back.

it was only after i made it across the street and up the way to the store, beginning to shake because those sorts of situations always actually scare me, that i realized what a blessing it all really was.

had the cross walk light changed as it was supposed to… had i taken a chance and crossed despite my usual rule to wait out drivers who pull up too far into the crosswalk…

i most certainly would have ended up in a much more frightening close encounter with that driver.

and then i laughed.

Allah is Good, Great, Merciful.

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